Me & Meeda on my 50th and flowers and cake from her!!
I turned 50 in the first week. Kind of panicked, kinda of didn’t care and honestly, kinda of proud … all at the same time.
A weeks worth of celebrations. The first was with my mom & dad in from out of town for my baby’s high school graduation.
A few nights later, the five of us celebrated together at Perry’s (fine dining steakhouse in Plano) and Andy’s Custard after (a favorite). I love spending time with my boys.
The next night and for the weekend, he (the ex) surprised me with a weekend at Broken Bow and one of my best friends and her husband met us there. It was a fabulous weekend of relaxation and fun. I thoroughly enjoyed it.
All in all, it was a wonderful birthday.
Then less than three weeks later, we took our youngest son Lubbock for his Freshman orientation at Texas Tech University. Another big step. Anticipating the change that was coming.
On the way there, my sister called, on Wednesday … said it looks like mom had a stroke. I asked if I needed to jump on a plane in Lubbock and she said just to wait and see what the doctors said first. She didn’t want me to miss out on Aaron’s activities the next couple days. So I waited and kept my phone close at all times.
Thursday and Friday with mom is kind of a blur. She was doing better. Then worse. Then better again. Everything from TIAs to urinary bladder infection (which can mess with the mind of an older person) to scary high blood sugar & blood pressure. They couldn’t seem to figure it out.
Saturday morning, I was back at home in Dallas and my sister sent me a picture of her and our mom. Mom was sitting up in her hospital bed and they were planning on discharging her that day. I talked to her. We laughed a little. It was good. I was relieved.
That night, we had a graduation party to attend, June 17. On the way home from the party, Missy called and explained things took a terrible turn. They had given mom a strong medication to try to help her but she had the rare side effects of the drug. Brain bleeds. It didn’t look good. She told me to come, as quickly as I could.
I jumped on the first flight out to Jersey the next morning. When I got off the plane, Missy and Dad picked me up. They had her on a ventilator and she was unconscious and they were waiting to give me a chance to say goodbye.
We went straight to the hospital. They gave me time with Mom alone in the room. It was private. It was honest. I held her hand. I touched her face. I laid my head on her mechanically forced beating chest. I told her that she was the most amazing mom. How grateful I was. How I already ached missing her. I apologized for not being there. So much guilt. I told her to love on the babies that I lost in miscarriage years ago when she got to where she was going. And then, I released her. I don’t know, I don’t know that anyone knows, if she could hear me … but I left nothing I could think of unsaid.
Dad and Missy came back in the room and they turned off her machine. And the four of us … the original FOUR WALLS (Walls is my maiden name) were together when she slowly slipped from this life into her eternal one. It was quiet.
And I watched that amazing, godly, loving, beautiful woman slip into her rewarded life with Jesus.
Just Amy 